How To Deal With The Problem Of Child Anger
Anger is not usually the first thing that comes to mind when we think of small children
. They are sweet, right? Like adults, children have lots of feelings, and resentment is one of them. What they do with that feeling is where the problem can start. Unlike adults, children have often not yet learned the best way to deal with their emotions. Child anger can be a problem for caregivers and teachers if a child's behavior becomes abusive.Some adults even have problems with the intense feeling of antagonism. Secondary emotions like annoyance, sadness, and jealousy have at their base primary emotions such as fear or hurt. It's important to understand this about anger to facilitate better ways of dealing with feelings. The more we understand, the easier we can manage any problem.
When a child or adult is in the midst of a major emotion such as anger, they don't commonly stop to think about what is causing it or positive ways to channel it. This is where a caring adult can help. The adult must come from a calm place and have good mastery of their own emotions to be able to help the child. Modeling good behavior is one important practice.
You probably feel frustrated and perhaps angry yourself if you are dealing with child's bad temper. No matter how you feel, you need to stay calm and slow things down if you want to be effective and handle the situation in a positive way. If you can't handle your emotions, it's hard to imagine a child doing so.
Talk to the child about feelings. That's the first step in dealing with emotional outbursts and undesirable behaviors that stem from them. By talking with the child, you help them begin to comprehend their feelings. You can help them start thinking of other possible outcomes. Ask them lots of questions to get them thinking. Ask them questions all the time. Get that little mind working. When people use the analytical mind, feelings get stopped in their tracks.
In the future, the conversations you start now with children will help them master their reactions. The ability to control themselves will build confidence. A confident child, in turn, manages feelings in healthier ways. Another way to help the angry child is to read books about feelings with them. Ask the child questions about the book and the feelings. Ask them if they ever feel those feelings and what they do when they feel those feelings.
Trauma and loss can result in lots of anger for small children. They already feel helpless and like they don't have control much of the time. If the child you are concerned about is dealing with a painful loss, it's advised to seek professional counseling. A professional can help you figure out the best methods for an individual child's problems.
If you are helping a child figure out new ways to deal with anger, consequences for inappropriate actions should be part of your approach. Children who are old enough can even participate in the discussion of what reasonable consequences may include. Without consequences, they will not have strong enough reasons for changing behaviors. Children are not alone, but sometimes they feel like they are. Anger is an overwhelming feeling and learning how to deal with it is an important growing lesson. Given the opportunity children can learn to deal with anger, and learning when they are young will ensure their future success.
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