Breakup Advice When Children Are Involved
Breakup Advice When Children Are Involved
There is no good breakup advice when children are involved to give. This is one of the most delicate breakup situations there is for couples to face today. Children are the hearts and souls of relationships everywhere and the, sometimes, unnoticed victims when things go wrong in these relationships. The biggest word of caution is to tread lightly and make sure that the children understand that it's not their fault when things go wrong.
Children need to know that they are loved even when things aren't working out between the two adults in their lives. Aside from that, there are a few other words of advice you'd do well to heed when children are involved in the relationship where a breakup is taking place. Don't let children hear you say disparaging things about the one other adult they love most in the world besides you. You want your children to feel secure in the love of the other person no matter how much that person hurt you. Make the time you spend with the children about them and not about you and what you're going through. The emotional distance that provides will do you and the children (who are more emotionally aware than most adults give them credit for) a lot of good.
There is no such thing as a good breakup when children are involved but you can make your best effort to be certain that this breakup doesn't serve to poison them against either one of you. The children are the only ones who are generally blameless in the event of a breakup. Don't let them take the blame on themselves. Provide constant reassurance and agree, between the two of you, to work together to make this easier on them. You don't have to get your ex back to make things better for your children but you might find that your children can provide a great source of motivation to give your relationship a second chance.
Sometimes, that second chance is the best thing for everyone involved. If you're willing to give it a try, there are things you can do that will make it much more likely to happen. They are small changes that will make a world of difference in your relationship.
Learn to communicate with your partner. This isn't just about getting on the same page. You also need to learn to ask your partner for the things you need and let your partner know when he or she is driving you up a wall. If they don't know these things you can't hold them accountable.
Learn to forgive your partner for not being perfect, not reading minds, and not quite living up to your expectations. Then you need to forgive yourself for all those things as well.
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