Parent Training - Why This Is Such A Great Investment For Our Children
Parent Training - Why This Is Such A Great Investment For Our Children
It is interesting and gratifying to see how parent training can really make a difference to a family. I know many enthusiastic parents who have done these courses or who have applied the principles and guidelines in any decent child behavior program.
The book When Your Kid Pushes Your Buttons by Bonnie Harris is also a good introduction to the whole topic and her wealth of experience comes through when you read this. I was fascinated to read that she applies responsibility across the board to both parents and children. Parents are encouraged to look at their part and their reactions to situations which generate conflict. Too often, we look at the child from a pedestal and we think that we never are the cause of all the arguments. But sometimes the way we react is like adding fuel to the fire.
Parents need to understand some basic things about what is going on in the mind of a child and teenager. They will learn why abusive and ineffective methods of discipline and control do not work at all. They will learn to understand what are the triggers to certain behaviors and how we can simply avoid these happening. We can also understand avoidance strategies and also how we can defuse some explosive situations.
It is parent training like this which can help to raise great kids who will become responsible and well balanced adults in the community. That is why this is such a wonderful investment for any country's children.
Moving to more affluent families, I was also fascinated to read Madeline Levine's book called The Price of Privilege. As a practising psychologist in California she observed a few things about these well off families and wrote a book about it. In effect this is a manual for parent training whether you are affluent or not!
This book examines why some teenagers from affluent families are prone to depression, hopelessness, passive and disconnected. The outcomes of these feelings is an alarming rise in drug abuse, alcoholism and self injury. The interesting thing is that the incidence of these problems is now about the same as those from deprived families.
Why is this happening in these well to do families? She has identified two main causes and one of these is that the kids are under a lot of pressure to achieve and be successful. Parental affection is conditional on how well or badly they do! She favors a parental style which is both authoritive and supportive.
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