Child Discipline - Alternatives To Saying No
At times, parents have to say NO to their children for their own benefit
. Refusing to grant their wishes and demands do not necessarily mean that they are loved less. In fact, parents love their children so much that they only have their best interest in mind.But then again, a refusal may be taken negatively by children. For this reason, parents sometimes find it really challenging to say NO to their kids without becoming the bad guy in their eyes. Even more so when a parent refuses to say YES to something that they want so badly.
But parents have to bear in mind that boundaries and limits are always associated with good parenting. You can use the following alternatives in making no more acceptable to your children:
Listen to what they are asking for and explain why they can't have it. A lot of times, parents just say no without even allowing the child to finish what they have to say. And since children often react negatively to the dreaded two-letter word, a good conversation can make things clearer to both parties. If the child sees that you are considering their request and only refused to grant it because it would not be beneficial, then it would be easier for them to deal with the denial. Most of the time, money is the main reasons why they can't have what they want. So make it clear to them and they will more likely understand.
Counterbalance the NO with a positive alternative. Offering something else as a replacement of what you are saying no to is helpful but not really that necessary. For instance, your son wants a really expensive robot but you cannot afford what is reflected on the price tag. You can talk to him and explain that the price is too much. Then make a compromise like buying something else that is more affordable then treat him to an ice cream or any of his favorite food later.
Work the situation out with a compromise. Let's say your child is asking for permission to invite friends to come over and you have a lot of things going on in the house for the day. Instead of just saying a blunt no, you can say it in a more positive way like "Today is not such a good idea, how about making it on another day like maybe tomorrow." When you present your children with another option, they will understand that you are considering their request. Instilling discipline in your child will always call for a lot of instances when you have to say no. By setting a limitation and letting your child understand about allowable parameters, you are not only nurturing your child but you are also making them understand that they cannot always get everything that they want.
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