A DOCTOR'S DIARY
. I tried to recollect some memoirs from my life which I want to share with readers. Surely they also felt same sometime in their life.
Is GOD belongs to riches?
During my first posting in Medicine ward, I presented a case of renal failure. Registrar came and taught us about renal failure then he said "This patient is in need of kidney transplant or repeated dialysis but being poor he can't afford, we gave him some multivitamin but soon he'll die from renal failure"
After three days I saw his empty bed, I didn't know whether he died or discharged. That day I realized GOD belongs to riches not poor. Health is strongly related to economy.
One's fault is other's loss
During my posting in skin and V.D. as intern I always remembered case of a cute innocent boy of 11-12 yrs old. He came with non healing ulcer on face which didn't respond to any antifungal or antibiotic for months. Then our consultant suspicion confirmed.He was suffering from AIDS. On inquest it was found that he received blood transfusion in periphery hospital through private blood bank which didn't waste money on routine tests. Our consultant referred him to SGPGIMS Lucknow. I forced to think what was fault of this innocent soul. He had to bear fault of others for throughout life.
Sorrows of other are..happiness of mine?
It was my first posting in USG department during my residency, I diagnosed case of multiple fibroids distorting endometrial cavity in 34yrs old patient. I was very happy since it was my first case which I diagnosed independently. By chance husband of my patient is our hostel's middle aged grocer. In evening I met him and told her condition. He knew same thing before.
He said "Is there any chance of getting pregnancy?" I said "I don't think so." "Doc sb. everyday there is tension in my life due to her condition, my mother says to remarry but I don't want and my wife weeps." He said.
My happiness came from sorrow of other's and that is my destiny. I'll earn from other's grief. But one thing more at least GOD changes one's sorrow to happiness through us.
Are we became machine.emotionless?
After a busy Saturday I was heading towards a friends party. I was already late and when I approached around hospital I saw an ambulance coming from opposite direction towards us.
I thought now no party. Our resident doctor was examining him. I knew they would give him first-aid, stabilize him then refer for investigation and it would take another half hour. I also went towards ambulance when resident doctor declared he is brought dead. Now I was heading towards party? But one question was in my mind which is striking my brain. Was I happy that I got chance to attend party after busy week or was I sad that one soul is lost? I didn't know. What would be your reaction?
We became machine ready to work 24x7 hrs without emotions. But it is also true if we become full of emotion we wouldn't be able to work efficiently. A surgeon's hand will tremble before operation; a physician will think more of drug's side effect than of effect.
Is GOD cruel?
Recently I diagnosed case of bilateral short femora in fetus of 35 years old lady. She wasn't conceived for 15 years of post-marriage.
After undertaking various treatment including allopathic, ayurvedic and spiritual she was pregnant this time. Treating clinician after seeing reports advised her abortion. She denied and said "I'll born my baby whatever complication"
She came again after 2 months, in month of September. This time her fetus was dead, looks dead at least for weeks. I had to disclosed her that which baby you were bearing for last 6 months and after 15 years is dead now. Hope which came after so many years was vanished.
I saw sunlight which was coming into my room disappeared since sun changes its direction.
A DOCTOR'S DIARY
By: Imran Mohd
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