The Curse of the Holiday Photo
The Curse of the Holiday Photo
"Wow that's not flattering, you look like Bernard Manning in a dress" barked an attractive friend as she flicked through my holiday photos. And how did I react? Shock? Anger? No, unfortunately this was an all too familiar sound when I relive my holiday memories through the power of photos! Because I have the dreaded curse of looking horrid on holiday.
In amongst my own kind the pasty British that is- I like to think I am above average in the style stakes or at the very least on a par with the trendies' of Oxford Street or East London. However something terrible happens when I go abroad. Suddenly sweat pastes down my blunt fringe and the sun reflect off my skin (which is incidentally the colour of paper) blinding passers by. The orange maxi dress that looked great on the hanger now suddenly resembles a Guantanamo Bay jump suit. Worst still my attempt to be on trend with harem pants and scandals makes me look like an actual Roman peasant girl or an extra from the British Museum.
As a teenager I attempted to fight this holiday curse by camouflaging myself in the look of my host nation be it a jumper tied at the shoulders in France or white jeans in Italy , even neon ski-wear in Austriabut all to no avail. The only exception to the rule being an ill fated holiday in Lanzarote which seemed to be curiously almost entirely populated by sun burnt and heavily tattooed Scottish men eating fry ups.
So as I retold my tale of woe and the curse of the holiday to my laughing six foot Swedish friend she concedes that she has exactly the same problem. I disagree loudly and she explains that I only look terrible because I am grimacing and look miserable in every shot. She also claims not to have even noticed the prison wear or sweaty fringe. And perhaps if I just be myself, smile and enjoy the tropical surroundings well then the pictures might turn out nicely after all. Advice I might just take!
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