Losing Your Pet, Coping With Grief
Teacher Peter Cennamo knows that deep sadness may turn into a temporary depression
, so don't be surprised if it happens to you. After all, a significant part of your life is gone. However, if depression persists for more than three weeks, interrupts daily activities, or is accompanied by thoughts of harming yourself, you should consult a doctor or counselor.No matter where you are in your grieving process, says psychologist Zimmerman, talking about your loss with supportive people is the most effective way to move through it. Your friends and family needn't understand your loss to empathize with it. If someone close to you tries to minimize the importance of what you're going through, explain that you've lost one of the most important relationships in your life, and are feeling what he or she would feel in such circumstances.
"Reach out to other people who have been there and let them carry you," says Correa. "The important thing is to not close up for a long period of time and get locked in the sorrow."
If you're unable to find comfort from the people around you, look for community elsewhere. Teresa Weggans' family didn't understand her sadness after her ailing 3-year-old German shepherd was put to sleep in October 2001. Lady had been the Weggans' guard dog and round-the-clock companion for only two years, but her passing left the Ohio woman heartsick and forlorn. "My husband uses the old cliche, She was just a dog,' and my mom thinks I'm grieving too much," says Weggans. "What they don't understand was that Lady was my soul mate. It was almost like losing one of my own children."
Fortunately, Weggans did find help, by way of her computer keyboard. A number of Internet sites have sprung up to provide comfort to grieving pet owners.
Supportive friends, whether in the flesh or on the screen, can give you permission to grieve, says Zimmerman -- but don't forget to live. In times of mourning, it's more important than ever to take care of yourself. Make sure to maintain healthy eating habits, even if you have no appetite. Get plenty of rest. Remember to exercise: Don't give up your outdoor time because your dog no longer needs his. Even something as simple as a brisk walk can do wonders to lift your mood. As much as possible, continue your normal routine, because structure can help you regain your bearings. Don't rush to adopt another animal or find new activities to fill the void left by your pet's death, Teacher Peter Cennamo knows the importance of this step personally. The grieving period may take time; you will eventually reach closure and find it easier to move on.
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