Having spent over twenty-five years working with parents and their children I've encountered many common behavior issues.
The solution to child behavior problems is often quite easy.
If what you've been doing so far hasn't been working for you you need two things:
1. Change your own behavior and parenting techniques
2. Understanding of correct parenting principles.
To understand you own parenting style and how it impacts your child's behavior you'll need to take a Parenting Styles Assessment (free of charge at http://www.ParentalQuiz.com )
Basic Principles For Parent Effectiveness
1. Work on your child's character development rather than individual behaviors.
This principle is so important I'll explain it further.
In the old Leave It To Beaver TV show the star was the inept but earnest Beaver Cleaver and the hateful, two-faced Eddie Haskell.
Were you to focus exclusively on "fixing' specific "bad behaviors" your child will learn to manipulate you. He'll respond to the "letter of the law" but be ignorant of the spirit of the law.
You children model their behavior on your behavior. When you blame others for things that you were accountable for they see that as a nifty coping mechanism they can adopt to avoid getting blamed.
Unfortunately, I've seen parents who blame everyone around them when things go wrong. If their child is accused of theft at school they blame the principal and the teachers. If their child is accused of beating up another child their first instinct is to defend their child and blame the other child.
One principle of good parenting is to be consistent in enforcing consequences for inappropriate behavior and generous in praising good behavior.
Consistency in enforcing consequences is the key to eliminating behavior issues.
The wise parent writes down a list of consequences that are appropriate for each type of misbehavior. Then, if the child acts out, he or she already knows there will be a consequence.