Grandparents And Divorce
Grandparents do not have an automatic right to see their grandchildren
. Normally, this is not an issue, but during a divorce access to the grandchildren can sometimes be denied. In the majority of cases where relationships with your in-laws were good prior to the divorce things clam down quickly and you get to see your grandchildren again fairly quickly. Be patient, but do not wait too long before tackling the issue.
In law only parents, stepparents, a guardian or a person with whom the child has lived for at least 3 years have the right to see the children. In other words, only people with parental rights to the child. This means that if a grandparent wants to see their grandchildren they need to use their powers of persuasion rather than the law, at least in the first instance.
When a relationship breaks down the grandparents should try to continue to see and speak to the grandchildren as normal. In this way, the relationship can often continue as normal. However, if the parent the grandchildren are living with begins to say no to your seeing your grandchildren, you need to try to resolve the issue quickly. Sit down with the parent and calmly explain that you are anxious to continue to be part of the child's life and feel that there is a distance developing between you. Ask the parent to assure you that you can still visit. Discuss when and where this can happen. Most importantly explain that you do not wish to take sides or interfere with the divorce.
If talking does not work then consider mediation. Obviously, both sides need to agree to meet to discuss things with the mediator. Most good solicitors keep a list of independent mediators that they can refer you to. Those solicitors that practice collaborative law are the best to approach for help.
Occasionally mediation fails too, if that happens you will need to go to court to get a contact order. You have no rights in law, but if you can prove you have been a significant and positive part of your grandchildren's life in the past you have a good chance of winning some contact rights. If you have become involved in arguments with family members during the divorce process, this can have a negative impact on your case for contact rights. Make sure that you use a solicitor with prior experience in getting contact rights for grandparents.
by: Julia Noone
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