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4 Tips for Boosting and Strengthening a Child's Self Esteem

4 Tips for Boosting and Strengthening a Child's Self Esteem

4 Tips for Boosting and Strengthening a Child's Self Esteem


It's natural for parents to resist babying their children when they feel down or beat themselves up inside. There's a part of us that feels they need to learn to accept the world on it's own terms and that if we leave them somewhat to their own devices, they'll get past their "weaker tendencies," become more confident (as well as independent), and work through their growing pains on their own.This may be somewhat true, but insecurity left unchecked can often just grow over time. Not to mention that apparent weaknesses can expose them as a victim to other children their age and lead to an endless cycle of just not feeling like they are good enough.I understand the tendency to think they must find a way to stand on their own two feet, but it is part of a parent's job to show them how. And this includes helping them recognize what they are capable of and growing a stronger self-perception.Here are 4 tips for building self esteem in your child.1. Discourage Negative Self-thoughtsThink about a time when you were feeling particularly down or were frustrated by something and then you said something, internally, bad about yourself. This might sound strange, but if you really think about it, most people do this. It might be something like telling yourself, "I"m such an idiot," or, "I always screw this up."What does that do to your inner state?It throws you into a deeper hole. For many people, it amounts to a whirlpool of emotions that sucks them down to an ultimate low, ruining their day or even their week.When children do this, they are often less reserved about it, and they will often say these things out loud. Catch them when they do something like call themselves stupid and tell them that's not true.Explain to them about bad days and good days and that failure and disappointment is often an opportunity for growth. Teach them the negative effect of self-talk, and give them more constructive ways to deal with frustration.2. Don't Hold Back PraiseOne of the ways we let our desire for our children to be independent hurt the relationship is by holding back compliments and flattery, as if we think that to praise is to baby them. But think about how you feel when someone pays you a compliment, especially if you know it is deserved.Even as an adult, it makes you warm inside. It boosts your self image and encourages you to continue with your small successes. Why would it be any different for a child?Congratulate them when they do well, thank them when they are helpful, and reward them when they do the right thing. They will mess up sometimes and even hurt others, in which case we need to apply corrective measures, but rewards are equally important.3. Teach Social IntelligenceSometimes we are too busy to encourage out children's social lives, especially if it means bringing other children into our home for the night. But this is an important part of growing up and social relationships are very important for a growing child.If they are being bullied at school, they absolutely need real friendships to make it through without becoming depressed or developing major anxiety issues. One of the best ways to encourage healthy social behavior is involvement in sports. Which brings us to...4. Proper Nutrition and ExerciseHealth is one of the number one contributors to emotional disorders and just feeling bad. Make sure your kids get nutritious food and plenty of exercise, and teach them the many reasons these things are so important. It's best to start them on an active lifestyle from a young age so that it stays for a lifetime.
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