Parenting Two Standard Deviations Above The Mean
Our kids are more in need of role models than teachers
. To be a great and successful caretaker and guide of your children, you need to be a great and successful caretaker and guide for yourself. Let's talk about following your own passions, being completely true to YOU, and being an authentic example to your children and therefore the best parent you can possibly be.
All my life I prided myself on not being average, the norm, or predictable. In statistical terms, using the Bell Curve analysis, I considered myself to be two standard deviations from the mean. In a Bell Curve, 2.2% of the data entries lie 2 SD above the average and 2.2% of the entries lie 2 SD below the average value.
Well, I was reminded of this today when I accompanied my 17 year-old son to the Apple Store to pick up his previously reserved iPad. Apple Corp. released their new, innovative iPad product this morning, and he was one of the lucky ones to be in the first group to enter the store, having woken at 6:30 and arrived at the store 90 minutes before opening. On a Saturday!
He started his own eBay business in seventh grade, bought his first Apple Laptop with his own money in eighth grade, upgraded his MacBook last year, and bought his own iPhone the first year they were introduced. Do you think he likes Apple? Do you think he likes innovation? He has never had a job punching the clock for anyone; works as an independent contractor to two companies; and he has a very healthy disrespect for the traditional education model in our American school system.
As I was observing him as the only teenager in line this morning, I was thinking how lucky he is to be living and thinking 'two standard deviations from the mean' as well.
Where do these kids get these ideas? I think he carefully watched me and his two older sisters making choices relative to our true passions in life and watched us disregard the opinions of others and follow our own guidance. He therefore has been willing to make authentic choices for himself that extend beyond what a typical teen would do, including all his friends. This is not a judgment of what is better or worse, it is simply an example of following one's own whims and internal emotional guidance, not worrying about what anyone else is doing, and not worrying about fitting in.
I think that in our parenting, we must remember that our children will learn way more from our actions than our words. It does not matter what we say, it matters what we do. Be sure to live your life and make choices for yourself, as you would wish for your children to live their lives and make choices for themselves.
Don't be afraid to show your kids the authentic YOU, and don't be afraid to live two standard deviations from the mean, and follow your passions!
And remember the slogan for that innovative leader in business, Apple Corp: THINK DIFFERENT!
by: Rick Schaefer
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