Why Weddings Take Place
A man takes his love on a romantic canoe ride
A man takes his love on a romantic canoe ride. They beach on a deserted island where a picnic is waiting with champagne, chocolate covered strawberries, Brie, apples and more. You feel as if you are in a dream as he gets on one knee and asks you to marry him. Your heart feels as if it might burst, so filled with love. You agree as tears stream down your face. You savor this moment, feeling it's just the two of you alone in the world, as if all the beauty on earth was put here for you.
As the afternoon fades, you row back to shore and start calling everyone you know to share the good news. They have questions - when, where, how? You don't have answers yet, but it's time to start planning. The wedding process can take a year to plan and execute.
When she realizes how much there is to be done, the bride can sometimes feel stressed out. There are dresses to pick out, a place to have the wedding, flowers, food, drinks and more. The husband-to-be does his best to be supportive, although planning a wedding was never on his list of top ten things to do. The bride feels alone - everyone has an opinion of how things should be done. The feeling of conquering the world starts to shrink a little.
Stop. Take a deep breathe. You are not the only bride to feel this way. But keep focused on the reason you are doing all of this. It's because you are in love. A wedding is supposed to be a way to bring two people together, not separate them. This is crucial to remember. Weddings are about love, about life-long commitment and self-sacrifice.
This part of the wedding, the love, can be overlooked with all the little things going on. So how do you make this time fun?
Keep the spark alive. Do what you have to do to have some time together where there is no talk of a wedding, no talk of wedding favors, guest lists or color schemes. Have a weekend away, or take a few hours on a weekend to do something you both enjoy, but remember no talk about the wedding during this time.
Another way to keep your love fresh is to take one night each week and have dinner together, either at home or at a restaurant and just talk. Talk about your fears and your excitement. Use these moments to remember why you got engaged in the first place. If you share common interests like tennis, golf, rock climbing or mountain biking, be sure to take time to do those things together. If the groom is out having fun while the bride is home planning, she might begin to feel some resentment. It's okay to have fun together. The groom might spend one night a week dedicated to helping his love with the planning and making decisions, or even two hours once a week.
Marriage takes a lot of work to be successful. Planning the wedding will be a test as to how the two of you cope with stress together. Learning to be open, honest and supportive will be the building blocks of a life of love and happiness.
by: Elaine Henshaw
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