Single Parents Dating Tips: Will A Relationship Work The Second Time?
Have you ever thrown out something, let's say
, like your favorite pair of jeans? Then you realise afterwards that it's "really really" your most favorite pair of jeans- and so you head back to the bin before you decide to ship it to charity. Once you have it with you, you try it on and find it's not as good when you really look at it. Well, there was once a saying comparing ex-boyfriends to an old pair of jeans.
Before you try and get back with your ex and try to "make a brand new start", it's essential that you look in yourself for the reasons on why you would want to get back together. Otherwise you might just carry all those unnecessary baggage of the past to the present. Ask yourself the following questions.
1. Why haven't you moved on?
These goes out to the two of you. Is it because that you consider getting back to the dating world and the world of the singles quite a hassle? And maybe getting back together is the safer, lazy option for both of you? This happens mostly to people who don't have the time, or the energy to go out and date again. That's why getting back with your ex is considered a compromise, but you still consider it the better option. Even though that it's not the best or practical solution for a good foundation in your relationship.
2. Does he have a new girlfriend?
That man who almost bored you to death with his hobbies, making you sleep with his stories becomes the funniest, sexiest man alive- once another girl is on the scene. When you get to see him with someone else while you are still alone and wallowing in despair brings jealousy. It's just a far cry from true love.
3. Are you scared of being alone?
When you are in a relationship for a long period, the sudden shift to being single can affect you. It might take a while for you to adjust. You miss those old familiar comforts your ex can give you. Before you would want to rush back into reconciliation, ask yourself why are you scared to be alone? Having some alone time might work well for you since you can build yourself, confidence and foster emotional independence.
4. What made you split apart?
When a relationship ends, there's always a reason behind it. Now you look back at your ex and what you have had with rose colored glasses- all the anger just dissipates. Think about this, if you two really are going well, then you should still be together. Then why have you broken up if that's the case?? Is there something between you two that just can't be worked out?
Past relationships are good when it lasted. Well, getting back with your ex might give you some relief first. Putting a stop to all those endless weeks of self-loath and misery where you still miss him. What usually begins as a great, wonderful romantic reunion full of flowers and sweets might deteriorate again to the same reasons why you broke up. Then you wonder what you did wrong and just beat yourself up emotionally. Endless arguments, crying, anger, and resentment. Then you realise that you still have your old problems, no matter how much you say you two would change- it's still there.
by: Andrea Carless
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