Relieve Stress With A Wedding Planner Diary
I recently stepped in to help a friend in the last stages of her wedding planning
. Being a man and the groom's best man, the bride wanted a man's perspective on how things were going and to ensure that the wedding and reception would be as fun for the groom, who was finishing a tour in Iraq, as it would be for her. As I went through her notes on the things she had accomplished and the ideas for things she had yet to do, I realized how stress free she was and why. She had to be the most relaxed bride I have ever met for someone about to be married in two short weeks. Her secret was in the notes.
Scattered among the outrageously unorganized notebook filled with torn out pages, a pattern emerged. She was writing not only about what she wanted to do, she was writing what it was like and describing her experiences and how she felt about them. Without realizing it, she was keeping a journal of her wedding planning experience. I spent an entire weekend sorting through the notes. I separated and typed up the personal parts and left the planning in the book. When I finished, what had emerged was an amazing novella of a woman's experiences with the world of wedding planning and of getting married in general.
Having been a big part of my mothers re-marrying and my sister's wedding, not to mention my own, I knew that my friend's bride to be should be a stressed out mess ready to pull her hair out by the roots. Instead, she was calm, collected, and had a firm grasp of exactly what she wanted and how to get it. This was totally out of character for her. When I looked at the unorganized way she took notes and jumbled dates and appointments, I could tell that she was not particularly organized or used to managing such a large task. Something had kept her calm and collected through all of this and it had to be the journal.
Writing down in words how she felt about each stage of the wedding planning had helped her to come to grips with her feelings and made her feel closer to the groom to be in his absence. She had written all of this down as if she were explaining to him what she were going through on a day-to-day basis and this had kept her on track and stress free. She told him about every detail, right down to picking out the bridal shower favors and wedding shower favors. It had served as a guide and a form of self-therapy for her and allowed her to handle every situation with a clear-headed and purposeful smile that all but ensured her wedding would go off without a hitch and that is exactly what happened.
I know that I was asked to help her wrap up the loose ends and take some of the pressure off her but in the end, she helped me much more than I could ever have hoped to help her. The valuable lesson I learned will serve me well when I am finally ready to settle down again. My first wedding was a frantic mess and I would have never looked forward to going through it again but now, I can honestly say that when it comes time for me to help plan my own wedding, this time, I would do it much better than I did the first time. Who knows, maybe someday someone will publish what we learned from this experience and that will help others to plan their wedding without as much stress.
by: Aaron Hu.
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