Shaun had an affair. He is sorry about it and he desperately wants his wife to take him back. He wants his marriage to get back to normal.
The last thing that Shaun wants is a divorce and he's ready to take whatever action is necessary to avoid that end.
If you are a man who's had an affair and you don't want to lose your marriage because of it, you will most certainly need to make changes and re-focus your attention on your relationship and yourself.
You and your wife will both need to work to improve communication and to reverse any bad habits that have formed over the course of your marriage.
After having had an affair, perhaps the number one thing that many people assume they'll need to do is to be 100% transparent with their spouse.
This means that you are an open book to your partner. You let her check up on you when you say you're going somewhere and that you'll be with particular people. You give her access to your e-mail account, cell phone messages and any social networking accounts you might have.
This kind of transparency and allowing may feel uncomfortable to you. It might seem like an invasion of your privacy...but it will demonstrate to your wife that you have nothing to hide.
Your commitment to her and your marriage must be shown to be clear and assured.
There's something beyond being 100% transparent with your spouse that will help you avoid a divorce after you've had an affair...
That is to be completely honest with yourself about why you cheated in the first place.
Go deep within yourself and look at your needs that aren't being fulfilled in your marriage as it is right now.
It might have to do with communication, feeling respected or appreciated, or it could relate to intimacy and your needs in the bedroom.
Don't be embarrassed or deem any unfulfilled need that you discover as unfair or irrational. Honor what you learn from yourself.
Your next step is to find a way to talk with your woman about this need-- in ways that don't make her feel judged or blamed.
Together, the two of you can make agreements and create solutions that will re-build trust and ensure that the needs of both of you are being met.