Can Or Should You Forgive a Cheater
Can Or Should You Forgive a Cheater
Because everyone has different answers for what is acceptable when selecting a partner, I think the trick to getting it right is to ask yourselves these questions before you get into a relationship. I cannot stress this point enough, "before" you get into a relationship. This way you have time to establish a standard or criteria before you select the person you want to get into a relationship with.
Here's the Scene
You have been in a relationship for 1 year. You are deeply in love with your boyfriend or girlfriend. Things couldn't be happier, rainbows and kisses for everyone.
Now you find out that
Your best friend has been hiding a deep dark secret from you (the best friend you've known and loved for a long time). One day your best friend decides to tell you about the affair they've had with your partner for the past 6 months. (All that time you thought you had selected the perfect man or woman to be with, and that it was truly a worthwhile relationship)
Their Remorse
Your significant other comes to you crying and begging for your forgiveness. They explain to you that they were weak' and made a huge mistake'. They also try to assure you by saying it will never happen again'.
Your Two Options
Dump the cheater? Or forgive the cheater? Which will it be?
Keep in mind that both of you have put a lot of time and effort into the relationship. You both feel the same pressure from friends and family to stay together in a happy relationship'. There might be some shame or embarrassment if you choose to dump them, but if you don't, there will be a lifetime of knowing that they cheated on you for at least 6 months. (6 months of which they looked into your eyes and outright lied)
So which will it be, Forgive or Dump Them?
I have seen different people try both of these options and I must say, the people who chose to dump their current boyfriend or girlfriend ended up in a much happier place. I think this is because they found a new life for themselves, and eventually a new lover.
Personally, I would dump the cheater no matter what outside pressure I'd feel to stay together. Honesty is very important to me and I know that cheating is not a mistake'. It is a deliberate action, carried out by a selfish being.
Whether you have or haven't been cheated on in the past, educate yourself as to what your goals and standards are for the future. This way you'll have a far better chance of selecting the right faithful partner for you.
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