To Save Your Marriage, Avoid Making These Mistakes
To Save Your Marriage, Avoid Making These Mistakes
When a marriage develops cracks large enough to be visible, most people panic and end up doing all the wrong things in an attempt to save the relationship from falling apart. They want to stall the divorce decision and kiss and make up. But mostly things are not that simple in a marriage and the repair work takes a long time and great amount of patience. If you are trying to save your marriage, the first thing you need to know is what not to do, more than what to do to salvage the situation from further ruin. Here is a list of don'ts to save your marriage:
1. Never make any promise that you cannot keep. Perhaps one of the most important things that your spouse needs is reassurance from you. With your efforts to save your marriage, make it abundantly clear that you have understood the mistakes in the past and you are going to take positive steps to rectify most if not all of them. Sound realistic about achieving your goals and do no end up over-promising and under-delivering.
2. Never give false assurances. In stead, make your sincerity of efforts show. Recollect the factors which were responsible for both of you to fall for each other. Make your partner believe that nothing is lost yet and you can easily bring back those days, provided he or she also lends a helping hand. The genuineness of your intentions can go a long way to save your marriage.
3. Stop telling your spouse repeatedly how strong your love is. This is not going to soften his or her hardened emotions. You need to show it in action more than words. Chances are that you might have to walk that extra mile to save your marriage, but at the end of the day, this is exactly what you want.
4. Never get into a confrontational mode with your spouse if you want to save your marriage. No amount of rationalizing your decisions or arguments about why the break up happened in the first place is going to break the ice. It is possible that you might be accused wrongly; you might be humiliated in the process to save your marriage, but learn to take in your stride. After all, it is all for a good cause. The more you tell your spouse about his or her own follies the farther they go from you making your task to save your marriage even tougher.
5. In case your spouse hints at a possible divorce, never try to convince him or her otherwise. Never plead with your spouse regarding the injustice that is being done to you, issues related to children, finance, etc. Remember in life, no one is indispensable - and life moves on. In stead, try to show the brighter side of continuing to live with you. To save your marriage, send out gentle reminders of the lovely time both of you once had, the things he or she liked about you and vice versa. In short, make your spouse think positive about you and the home environment. To save your marriage, it becomes doubly difficult when the environment is charged with negative energy.
Hopefully, these simple don'ts would be of help to save your marriage and make you a better manager of relationships.
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