Recovering From A Painful Break Up
Recovering From A Painful Break Up
Recovering From A Painful Break Up
Love relationships end for a multitude of reasons. Couples both unite and break up everyday. Recovering from a painful break up is never easy, neither for you or your significant other regardless of who broke up with whom.
Ask anyone who's experienced it, and they will tell you that a broken heart actually hurts physically. In fact, it was originally coined a "broken heart" because of the physical pain that is often associated with the hurt feelings caused by the dissolution of a close love relationship. Beyond this unmistakably ill, aching feeling, there is the more important void in your life that is difficult, to say the least, to fill. And, in order to get passed the past to move on beyond your failed relationship, your primary goal will be to come to grips with your life now that your partner is no longer a part of it.
Recovering from a painful break up takes time, amongst other things. Of course, while you wait impatiently, watching the clock, hoping for the time to come when you are finally feeling fine again, you probably will have a difficult time believing that you ever will. Time seems to go by so slowly with your mind constantly engorged with every happy memory of your ex. And, to add to your despair, you struggle with your own human nature as you attempt to adapt to your "new" life, one which no longer revolves around the inner-workings of another human being's lifestyle.
The first thing you need to do in order to move on after a break up is to accept the loss for what it is, acknowledging it completely. Unfortunately, you have no other options at this point, so hanging on to a lost love will only prolong your process of recovery and moving on. Try to wrap your mind around the concept, the fact that you and your partner are no longer together. He or she will not be coming back tomorrow or a couples of days, months later. Do your best to truly accept and understand this clearly. Unfortunately, in doing so, you will likely be forcing yourself to deal with the pain of the break up directly. However, this is also part of the recovery process.
Your next step is to confront your feelings of hurt, loss, or betrayal (whatever the case may be). Dealing with your emotions is a very important part of recovering from a painful break up. Many people make the mistake of trying to avoid their feelings in a time of loss. They do whatever they can to preoccupy their mind and time with work or other tasks to avoid dealing with the hurt. However, the emotional impact of a break up is very similar to the loss of a loved one such as from death.
You must allow yourself to dwell in and experience the pain of your loss at first. When a loved one passes away, typically a funeral is held. This "ritual" serves two main purposes. One purpose is to allow you a time to grieve openly for your loss, to share your feelings with those that are still a part of your life and that you can confide in. Take comfort in that your life is still filled with those that love you, and make use of their comforting ear. The other purpose is to provide an end point, a time to say "goodbye," and let them go, which brings us to your next step.
Once you've accepted your loss and let out your emotions, your mind is clearer, and you're in a in a more calm and collected state. The next step in recovering from a painful break up is to let go of your feelings for your ex. One way to help yourself in doing this is to gather anything that you have that reminds you of your ex including photos, clothes, and even his or her toothbrush, and either box them up to be put away out of sight or thrown away (even burned) if you feel you have no further use for those "memories" of your life. This action could be compared to the act of lowering the casket at a funeral signifying the final goodbye to your past relationship. In addition, it helps to remove any thoughts about your ex from your mind. Think the old adage, "out of sight, out of mind."
Once you've completed the previous steps, the next thing to do is to simply let time work its magic. As they say, "time heals all wounds." Give yourself whatever time you need. In the meantime, you can help the process along by diving back into your favorite hobbies, spending time with friends and family, and even traveling. Try to enjoy your "new" life by doing the things you may not have been able to do while you and your partner were together.
Recovering from a painful break up is an experience none of us ever looks forward to in life. However, with time, you will learn to make the most of it, and you may even learn some important lessons from the failed relationship so that the next one that you fall into has a much happier ending.
http://www.articlesbase.com/breakup-articles/recovering-from-a-painful-break-up-3812096.html
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