Formalities in a Hindu Wedding
The formality steps In a Hindu wedding marriage of Indian youths and maidens is arranged and brought about their elders, to wit, parents or guardians
. The custom of betrothal as well as the going through of the preliminary formalities followed in India is perhaps unique. Parents and guardians of marriageable youths and maidens meet and have a talk. They exchange horoscope marriage with respect to the hindu astrology of boys and girls and go to consult astrologers about the suitability or otherwise of the marriage with reference to the stars and the position of the planets noted in them at the time of their birth. The hindu horoscope marriage are compared to see in how many of the ten aspects laid down they suit each other. The aspects, would involve, suitability regarding the asterism, suitability regarding the ganam such as human, suitability regarding the relationship arising out of the planets the boy and girl were born under, suitability arising out of yoni or genital organ which each asterism is assigned and which goes by the name yonipporutham. Certain yonis only could suit; for example, the yoni of the elephant and lion cannot suit while the same yoni for both would suit, and more.
When both the parties agree that the marriage between the boy and the girl may be celebrated they proceed to the discussion of the terms of marriage. That is, they discuss and settle what each side should give to the other side by way of gifts of cash, silver and brass vessels, jewellery and so on. Then they exchange pan supari and the function goes by the name nichayathambulam. Subsequently, on a day, previously fixed as convenient for both parties, the hindu bride's party proceeds to the residence of the bridegroom's party with two or three brass plates containing sugar candy, sugar, bananas, betel, areca nuts, flowers, sandal paste, saffron, etc., and is received by the other party. Then as many of the villagers as possible are invited. After all have assembled, the bride's party announces that they have resolved to give the girl to the hindu groom and the boy's party accepts the offer. The terms of the marriage too are announced by the parties and accepted. One party, if agreed upon, may then make cash payments, to the other. Then fruit, sugar, sandal paste, pan supari, etc., are distributed to those present and a feast is held to which not only the boy's party, but also the villagers either all or a select few are invited. The leader of the boy's party is presented with a pair of new clothes as a mark of reciprocal respect.
As the date of the celebration of the marriage is decided upon at the time of meeting prior to the distribution of fruits, and the feast, the bride's party then returns home to make the required preparations and arrangements. One day prior to the wedding ceremony, the bridegroom is taken in procession to the house kept ready for his reception. The bridegroom's party occupy that house till the marriage ceremony is over and then the bride's party gives them a send off. At the time of the Nichithartham function the bridegroom's party should give for the use of the bride a pretty saree to wear with a blouse piece. Except to a widow, no saree should be presented without the addition of a blouse piece on any occasion whatsoever.
As soon as the bridegroom is received in the house provided for his use after due procession, the gentleman who is to give away the bride, presents to the bridegroom a pair of new clothes wearing which and helped by his father or in his absence by some elderly member, he has to go through a ceremony called vratham. As soon as the vratham is over the bridegroom pretends that he is on his way to Benaras. Then the bride's party or rather the one who is to give away the bride meets him and requests him not to go to Benaras. He offers to give his daughter or ward, as the case may be, to him in marriage with a view to make him settle down and lead a family life.
The bridegroom of course embraces the offer and throws away the paraphernalia of a pilgrim. He is then taken to the hindu bride's house and there the girl is gifted over to him. Then with the assistance of the family priest he marries the girl received by him as a gift, after going through certain formalities and marriage rites and ceremonies. When once they are married by the observances of the prescribed rites, nothing can part them and they are man and wife for life.
The reason why a large number of people are invited to be present at the time of the wedding is perhaps to make it impossible for the hindu groom to deny having married the girl if he were tempted to do so. Further, daily processions (this refers to the time when a marriage used to be conducted over a number of days. This practice has long since been discontinued) and if that not be possible, at least the procession on the last day of the marriage, made it known even to those not present at the time when the marriage knot was tied, the fact they were man and wife for evermore.
Formalities in a Hindu Wedding
By: Sujoy
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