Dating Advice For Women Who Met Someone Online
This dating advice for women - grown-ups who are past the heady infatuations of adolescence
- concerns getting ready for a date with someone they met online. Blind dates can and have led to satisfying relationships, and, of course, they have also led to many 'worst experiences of my life' evenings. Meeting someone online is just the modern version of the blind date, and the same rules hold true for this new twist in the mating game.
You and the man you are about to meet have had a chance to compare lifestyles, ages, education and career news, and interests. There is enough common ground between you that you have now decided to meet and make an connection in real time and space.
Don't waste that online time. Know what you are really seeking before you enter your profile into the website. Are you only looking for casual friendship which might deepen with time? If so, the basic information of lifestyle and interests might be enough to feel that you are ready to date. If he is tall enough, has sufficient education, and doesn't talk about things you have never heard of - or at least have no interest in, since differences can be fascinating - that might be enough to spark your interest. Then you should establish that he is free to date, also interested in casual friendship, and ready for a simple step forward in your acquaintance.
If what you want is a fast lane to home and family, more investigation may be called for. Don't waste time and energy - yours or his - on someone from a swinging singles site or who has listed his muscle car as his main love. Go ahead and talk about the serious things online before you meet, and find out in advance what his life goals are. If they are important to him, he will be glad to tell you about them. Let him know you have already picked out the name of your firstborn and started saving for a down payment.
Once you agree to meet or even before, you must consider the details of the first date. Do you want to meet for dinner or more casually for lunch or just a drink? Meeting in a sunny lunchroom may lead to a clearer picture of your date than if you are drinking wine in the seductive light of candles. You may want to make the first meeting informal, so it does not seem overly important or intimate, until you know each other better.
Also think carefully about what you will wear, meaning think more about the impression you will make and the impact of your fashion statement than how well it becomes you. You don't want to overwhelm the guy with your beauty when you may not want to extend the relationship. You will want to look great but not necessarily like you have made the supreme effort. Also, dress true to who you really are. If you are a sporty type, wear jeans or slacks, and understated make-up. If you love eye shadow, long nails, and bouffant hair, go for it. Part of the fun is getting ready, after all.
If you are looking for a steady beau, it is only fair for you to set the bar at a realistic height before you and he begin to jump through the hoops. If you demand a lot of yourself and set high goals, make that a part of the ambiance from the beginning. No sense meeting a man without a career and a retirement fund if these things are important to you. If you are hoping for a future beyond the first meeting, it makes sense to clarify your expectations in your own mind and give him a clue, as well. That way you stand a much better chance of meeting an equal whom you will be able to imagine a life with.
You should also set the limits of intimacy before you start. You may want to meet on neutral ground rather than at your home. You may want to join a group rather than be alone. This is not hard - let him know that you will be in a certain place with a group from your work and suggest he stop by. You do not have to be imposed on in any way when agreeing to meet someone. It is only fair to yourself and the other party to know what your preferences are and to decide in advance what your standards will be.
Finally, do not expect too much for the first date. After all, you know nothing about this man for all practical purposes. Even if the encounter does not lead to further dates, it will still be a chance to get to know someone in pleasant surroundings. So what if you write him off at first sight or after half an hour of conversation? Have the courtesy to make the time you spend together comfortable for both of you, and hope that he will return the favor if you have not engaged his interest. Anyway, he may have friends that will suit you better.
It will either be the start of something big or a little dull. But don't worry about it. It beats sitting home letting life pass you by even if it is not altogether wonderful. And if it is, the stars in your eyes will make waves in his heart, because that is the way it goes. All you will have to do is let love take its course.
The point of this dating advice for women is that preparation, both mental and spiritual, will be as important as choosing the right outfit to make this date as meaningful and memorable as it should be.
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Dating Advice For Women Who Met Someone Online
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