Counselling - To Phone Or Not To Phone - Men That Don't Call After A Date

So you went on a date with a guy and things went well

. At the end of the night the guy said he'd give you a call, but he never calls you back. Maybe he does call back, but certainly not when you expected based on what he said. He said tomorrow and you figured he meant tomorrow. That seems like a pretty obvious statement. What are men thinking? It's not a lot of fun to be left hanging, wondering where things are at, considering the fact that you enjoyed yourself. He seemed to enjoy the date as well. What's happening in these sort of dating situations?

There are a couple options.

1. He's not interested in you. He doesn't feel you have enough in common. He said he'd call as a way of being polite. He didn't tell you the truth because he doesn't want to risk having you upset at him. Seeing you sad is not something he wants to see either. This behaviour can certainly be very self serving as your date is only concerned with making life easier for himself. He's not taking into account the fact that he's leading you on. By saying one thing and doing something different, he is playing games. Conversely, there are lots of people in the world of dating who don't know how to take no for an answer. It's distinctly possible that he's attempted to tell a previous date the truth, that there was no future for the two of them. His date blasted him or even worse, began crying.

2. Fear of rejection. He likes you but isn't sure if the feeling is mutual. He is too scared to get honest feedback from you. Asking a woman out on a date is a very challenging endeavour for some men. The only thing tougher is phoning her the next day. Was she simply being polite or does she actually like me? The men that are most prone to this sort of problem don't understand the process of dating. They're unaware or unclear about the fact the process of dating requires a fair amount of trial and error. The goal isn't to have it all figured out after the first date. He would do well to simple phone and see if there is enough mutual interest for a second date. These sort of men are often consumed with winning a woman over. Instead they should be looking to find a woman who is a fit or a good match for who he is. He views the outcome of the phone call as either a win or lose situation.

3. Doesn't know what he wants. He worked up the nerve to ask a woman out on a date. He went through with the date. This may be all he can handle when it comes to relationships. Dating has a level of emotional detachment that many men and women find they can handle. They can manage well as long as the relationship doesn't become something more complex. Intimate relationships that go beyond simple dating require a level of vulnerability and transparency many people aren't willing to engage in.

by: Chris Keenan

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