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Budget Wedding Planning: Determining Your Guest List

Congratulations on your new engagement! Now its time to think about what your wedding day will be like

. You have to figure out where you will be saying your vows. You have to arrange for a tuxedo or get fitted for a wedding dress. You have to set up a bridal registry and choose the gifts that you hope to receive. You have to book your honeymoon. You have to pick out a cake, colors, flowers, favors, caterers, and more.

And who exactly will be coming to your wedding?

Right. Dont forget about the guest list.

In fact, the wedding guest list is one of the biggest determining factors in how expensive the wedding will be. And if youre trying to adhere to any kind of wedding budget, choosing your guest list is an important first step in that process.

Here are some wedding planning tips for determining your guest list in order to stay within your budget.

Identify Per-Person Costs

Some wedding expenses will stay the same no matter how many people attend (such as the wedding dress, honeymoon, marriage license, etc.). But many other costs are dependent upon the size of your guest list. For instance, most catering companies price their offerings on a per-person basis in order to determine how much food to prepare. Also, youll need to know how many invitations to order and wedding favors to buy. So do some computations and figure out how many guests will be permitted under your wedding budget.

Pick a Number and Stick to it

Once you complete your calculations, decide upon a number of guests and try very hard not to exceed it. Traditionally, the number of invited guests is split evenly between the families of the bride and groom; but if one family is bigger than the other or must travel a greater distance to attend, the per-family allocations may differ significantly. The most important thing is to communicate your expectations to each other and make sure youre on the same page.

Adjust the Number for Declined Invitations

The rule of thumb for weddings is that between 10% and 20% of the people you invite to your wedding will send their regrets. So be sure to factor this figure into your wedding guest computations.

Start Prioritizing

Its okay to brainstorm as many names as possible of people to invite to your wedding. But once that first draft list is complete, it will be necessary to start making choices. Ask yourself: who is such an important part of your life that you simply cant imagine them not being at your wedding? Put them on the definite list. Conversely, determine if there are certain people (like acquaintances, work colleagues, or distant relatives) who can be relegated to the maybe list. Consider crossing them off the list if the budget or space constraints are an issue.

Check with Families

If your parents are heavily involved in your wedding (especially financially), then you will need to listen to their input regarding the guest list. This could mean you will have to invite some people you barely know or dont care for simply to maintain familial harmony. Yes, it is your wedding but you have to pick your battles. Which brings us to.

Identify who you DONT want to be There

It is not uncommon for couples to have a few people in their lives that they absolutely do not want showing up on their special day. These may include:

Ex-girlfriends or boyfriends

Estranged family members

People who may drink too much and/or cause a scene

Also, if you are trying to whittle down your guest list, you may wish to consider not allowing children or guests of invitees (a.k.a. +1s) to attend.

Determine the Capacity of the Venues

If you simply have to hold your wedding in that quaint little chapel overlooking the harbor, do not invite 300 people if the church can only seat 100. Similarly, if the place where you are holding the reception is small, you should not try to cram too many guests into the space. If wedding guests are forced to stand shoulder to shoulder because seating is not available, they will not enjoy themselves.

Stack the Deck if Necessary

If youre still worried about having too many wedding invitees, you might consider tilting the odds in your favor. You could change the location of the wedding from the brides hometown to the grooms or vice-versa if you think that would discourage a significant number of people from making the trip (or just plan a destination wedding at a faraway location to really reduce the guest list). Another option is to schedule the wedding strategically like during the holidays or during Super Bowl weekend, for instance so that only people who really want to see you tie the knot will attend.

Out of all of the details associated with a wedding, deciding on the guest list should be one of the first issues addressed. So dont put it off until several weeks before the wedding or you might be dealing with other problems in the days leading up to the big day. And you dont need any more pre-marital stress than you already have!

by: Kristen Dysart
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