A Parent's Guide To Helping Children Deal With Prejudice
As a parent, you doubtless are familiar with the host of issues your child has to
learn to contend with, while hopefully being guided and taught by you. One of these major issues is prejudice.
Prejudice is hard to deal with, whether your child is the one encountering it or perhaps even the one learning to treat others fairly.
Why Prejudice Happens
In this era, communities are more multicultural than ever before. We are exposed to a great variety of people from different nations and backgrounds. An open-minded individual will find this fascinating, but for those who aren't tolerant of other people, it can be scary to see people who aren't the same as themselves! When people are met with something unfamiliar, their natural reaction is often wariness, discomfort, and anger. This anger can too easily be channeled into prejudice against people who are different in some way.
Children are sometimes responsible for treating others with prejudice because they simply aren't unaware of their own biases. Children in particular tend to pick up cues from adults and other children without being aware of it, and if parents don't teach them tolerance, they can grow up to be prejudiced adults. Your role as a parent in stopping prejudice, then, is an important one: to teach your child how to treat everyone with equal respect.
Treating Others Fairly
When you're talking to your child about prejudice, it's important to pick the right moment and handle the situation calmly.
Ideally, have the conversation with your child when you see an example of prejudice, so you can use this real-life example to teach him to appreciate and tolerate differences. This can be while watching TV, in a book, or even in real life (as long as it's safe, of course). News stories are another great way to point out the negative consequences of prejudice for both parties.
You can begin by helping your child see that everyone is different. Even among your family members, there are probably differences, and this is a perfect learning opportunity. If he has a sibling, point out the differences between them, and how he and his friends like different things too. The idea is to let him know that differences are common, even among family members, and they're okay!
Take a light yet serious tone (never yell or intimidate a child, as this will negatively reinforce the lesson and perhaps reverse your hard efforts later).
If it helps, you could ask the child about the last time he felt hurt when someone else pointed out something different about him.
Above all, teach your children to make sure they treat other people with respect, just as they would like to be treated. This simple rule is an easy way to reinforce the lesson; have the child ask himself whether he would like to have someone else tell him what he's about to say.
Encountering Prejudice
In some ways, a far more difficult conversation than that of avoiding prejudice is what to say when your child has already encountered prejudice directed towards him.
Always make sure the child understands that the incident was in no way his fault. It can be easy to feel that it was when one hasn't experienced prejudice before.
When discussing the encounter with prejudice, focus on the actions that hurt the child's feelings, rather than the person behind them. Responding to ignorance with hatred will only create a vicious cycle of harm and won't do any good for the child in the long run.
Talk about how else the other person might have handled the situation, giving him coping mechanisms to use himself when it's tempting to treat others with prejudice.
Help him to see that prejudice happens when people don't understand or accept differences. Emphasize that some people are made uncomfortable and angry when anyone comes along who is different in some way.
Prejudice is never an easy subject, and it can be particularly scary to address as a parent. Nobody wants to think that their child could be prejudiced or treat anyone unfairly, but luckily, you can take action to greatly influence how respectful and tolerant your child will be for the rest of his life.
by: Kevin Andersen
Becoming An Adoptive Parent 5 Considerable Tips For Efficient Teen Parenting How To Clean Your Kids Toys Personalised Christmas Gifts For Grandparents How To Find Information On Family Tree Creative Ways To Address Anger Management For Kids A Little Advice For New Parent How To Choose A Convertible Car Seat How To Keep Your Baby Safe In Their Cribs "what Every Parent Ought To Know About Their Aspergers Child........." Does Discipline Really Change The Behavior Of Children? Christmas Gifts For Mothers: The Best Personalized Christmas Gifts For Mom A Parent's Guide to Handling Boomerang Kids