5 man Cocktails Get Drunk Without Jeopardising Your Manhood
The guys reading this will all know the feeling
. Its getting late and youre at the bar deciding what to get, looking over the vast array of beers and bourbon on offer, when a chick next to you gets served a brightly coloured concoction, enveloped in ice with a piece of fruit precariously hanging from the rim of the glass. Jealously you turn to the bartender to order what by now looks like a pretty average option of bourbon and coke wondering what could have been.
Lets face it guys, cocktails have it all heaps of alcohol, go down easy and you only need a few to get well-tipsy. The problem is however all this comes at a cost, being your credibility as a man. Unfortunately guys are limited to either beers or spirit named after a Jack, Johnny, Jim and Jose, lest they suffer the judgement of peers and strangers alike.
So we decided to step in and make a list of the 5 most manly cocktails that can be drunk openly and freely without fear of judgement or retribution.
5. Depth Charge Beer and Jagermeister
Its the Jagerbomb on steroids. Instead of an airy fairy can of red bull, you use a glass of beer and drop the hammer. You can use an imported beer to add a touch of class to it, but again, the object of the exercise is not to give the illusion of sophistication but to ensure a big night out. We recommend you start off with something smaller then a pint we endorse drinking responsibly.
4. Black Russian Vodka, Coffee Liqueur and Kahlua
Thats right comrades this is the hard mans cocktail unlike its girlfriend the White Russian. Aside from the hard ass name, the Black Russian is one of the few cocktails that doesnt mess around with mixers or a fancy high ball glass. Its so bad ass there isnt even a standard on the proportions of each ingredient especially good if you arent partial to your eyesight.
3. Long Island Iced Tea Vodka, Gin, Tequila, Rum and Triple Sec with 1 1/2 parts sour mix and a splash of cola.
This is almost as hard as a cocktail gets. Its the heavy weight, full forward, front rower and line backer of the cocktail world all rolled into one. This cocktail doesnt mess around with fancy ingredients, umbrellas or delicately placed pieces of paw paw. Its a tall glass with random shit in it that will get you drunk. It might taste like rocket fuel, but lets face it, what do you expect its got 4 shots in it.
2. The AK-47 Vodka, Gin, Tequila, Rum, Whisky, Triple Sec, Guinness and Cola
When you want to kill every mother#%$&# in the room, accept no substitute to the AK 47. This cocktail is so hard core we recommend you use the other cocktails on this list as chasers. We have no idea who invented this cocktail, but it looks to be on par with the hydrogen bomb, anthrax, country music and other weapons of mass destruction. Legend has it that the AK 47 was first used by the allies in 1943 as a replacement for pitch tar whilst building roads to support supply lines to the German front.
1. Molotov Cocktail Petrol, Paraffin and Fire
You probably wont be able to order this one at your local bars, but the Molotov cocktail is by and far the hardest cocktail ever invented. Developed by the Spanish during the civil war, the Molotov Cocktails notoriety began in 1939 by the Finns whom found this cocktail an effective means of stopping advancing Soviet heavy artillery. So effective was this weapon that the Finns mass manufactured over 450,000 of them during the course of the war and for that reason, we have awarded the Molotov Cocktail the award for the hardest man cocktail on earth.
by: Ben King
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