subject: How To Find A Good Marriage Officiant [print this page] It's every persons wish to find someone who will perform the kind of ceremony they envision or shares the same belief system and style as the bride and groom. This also extends to matters legal, especially for those that want their union to be recognized by the law; they'll want to ensure that the officiant is qualified to conduct a civil union.
The first most basic thing you and your intended bride or groom must do is decide if you want a religious or secular ceremony. This highly personal decision will have great impact for who will marry you.
Secular Marriage Officiant
City Hall
It's easy to find someone to marry you at the city hall. You'll need to make an appointment and be willing to be married in a speedy fashion - no long drawn-out sermons here! Call your local city hall and they'll tell you everything you need to know.
A Justice of the Peace
Contact the county clerk's office where you will get your marriage license. They should have a list of local Justices of the Peace who are willing to perform wedding ceremonies. You can, of course, look in the phone book, but it's better to get the referral from someone who knows for sure that they are legally certified.
A Friend or Relative
This is a new trend that's becoming a popular option, as couples look for a more personal element in their ceremony. In some states such as California, a friend can get a one day designation of Deputy Commissioner of Marriages to perform weddings for a $40 cost. Others have chosen to get ordained on the internet through the Universal Life Church, but before you choose this option, you'll want to talk to your county clerk's office or Secretary of State's office to make sure that it is recognized in your state.
Religious Wedding Officiant
If you already have a family clergyperson, or you're getting married in a house of worship, your choice is easy. I suggest still meeting with that person to discuss the questions below and making sure you're comfortable with them.
Otherwise, you'll need to decide first what denomination best fits with your beliefs. Once you've done that, contact your local house of worship to ask if their religious rules allow them to marry people in secular settings. You might attend some worship services to get a sense of different officiants' styles, then meet with them to make sure that they are available on your date, and amenable to the type of wedding you envision.
Some questions to ask:
* How much are we allowed to customize the ceremony?
* Can we write our own vows?
* Will you marry us even if we are not current members of your house of worship?
* How do we become members?
* If we are of different faiths, or one of us is not religious, is that a problem?
* One of us is divorced; does your religion allow you to marry us?
by: Greg Savoie
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