subject: Fixing A Broken Marriage After She Cheated [print this page] Cheating is not only a problem itself; rather it could be a result of the arising problems that most average marriages and relationships are experiencing.
Let's face it. Happy people don't cheat. It doesn't mean that it's your fault your wife cheated on you. That's not what I'm saying at all. It does mean that you're going to have to look way beyond the cheating to find out what is really going on with your marriage and have any hope at all of making things right.
How do you go about healing though once the deed has been done and all the cards are on the table about your wife's cheating?
1)Get to the root of the problem. There are many times when it is better to focus on the future but in this particular case you're going to have to take a long, hard look back before you can even hope to begin looking forward. Until you get down to the source of the troubles in your marriage, you aren't going to be able to have your long, happy life ahead of you.
2)Work out a compromise or solution for the problem that both of you can live with. This is not the time for false promises. It isn't the time to make bargains that are just too difficult for you to sustain for the rest of your lives. Chances are that both of you are going to need to bend in order to bring the real healing your marriage needs to bear. Make sure that in bending, neither of you must break.
3)Discuss your expectations, hopes, and dreams for your marriage. I know. It's not something most guys are easily willing to open up about but this is one time you need to be the one to take initiative and get the dialog going. Hopefully two things will come out of this conversation. One, you'll both see areas in your marriage where improvements can be made. Two, you'll both learn to recognize that some of your expectations for marriage are a bit unrealistic and adjust them accordingly.
4)The most important thing is to know your priorities or goals. If you set it right, it could be your motivating factor to work out the marriage. Give each other the support needed to achieve what you had lain down. Then, envision the future with optimism.
by: T Dub Jackson.
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