subject: Divorce Help for Men – Learning To Deal with Your Post-Divorce Life [print this page] If you're finding it difficult to deal with the emotional and mental strain that divorce has brought about then you're not the only one as thousands of other men undergo the same pains and problems that you are experiencing right now. The reason why is because of the fact that there is so little support available for men. Society in general treats men as the stronger of the sexes in terms of physical and emotional strength which leads to the misconception that whatever happens they will be fine and that they don't need help.
But this is very far from reality as many men DO encounter problems, DO find it difficult, and DO need help. Thankfully there are articles (like this one) that will be able to help you out. So, let's get on to it shall we?
First, in order to deal with the problems that you have at the moment a deeper understanding of your emotions is necessary. This level of understanding and introspection can be difficult to achieve for many guys especially those who have been brought up into a mode of thinking where the only way to deal with difficult things will be to "suck it up and take it all in like a man." Well sucking it up may be needed to a degree but not to the point where you are already sacrificing your mental and emotional wellbeing.
So, here is one post-divorce advice that has helped me to maintain my sanity, that you might be able to find useful as well.
Don't Be a Slave Self Esteem
Before, during, or even after divorce, your self esteem will be at an all time low. At one point you were the king of the household, the queen by your side and possibly a family that you were the head of and then all of a sudden from out of nowhere, divorce comes and takes it all away in an instant.
Your self-esteem is devastated, it will suffer, and it will be hungry for attention. Attention from anyone, anywhere, any time. But do not be lured by its temptations, it is nothing more than a trap that will lure and destroy you in the end. Trying to regain a sense of control by feeding your self-esteem can lead to many dangerous and destructive habits like; alcohol, drugs, violence, womanizing and many others all of which are temporary and damaging.
Instead of feeding your self-esteem, concentrate on achieving happiness with yourself first. Be happy with the life you have now without letting other people's judgment affect you. Your state of mind is your way out of the mess that you are in now, and only you will be able to determine when that will happen.
This is not the easiest thing to achieve though, so do not feel down if you fail on the first few tries as it even takes other men years before they come to a stage of acceptance and recovery. One that does not need to feed on self-esteem or ego to survive. To find out how this can be achieved and many other essential tips on letting go, click on the link below and start finding your way to real divorce help for men.
