subject: Going Back to the Dating Scene: How to Conquer the Fears [print this page] Going Back to the Dating Scene: How to Conquer the Fears
Going back to the dating scene after a breakup or a divorce can be very frightening. After all, it means you are open to the possibility of going into a relationship again. You are making yourself vulnerable to pain again. There is also the truth that there are no guarantees in relationships. It can either turn out for the better or for the worse.
That is why even before you decide to join the dating game, you already have learned how to conquer your fears.
1. Make sure you are ready.
Never go on a date without coming prepared for it. This means you have already let go of the past and you look forward to the future. But how do you know that you are ready? You can ask yourself some questions:
Am I no longer affected by my ex?
Can I guarantee I do not end up comparing the new guy with my ex?
Can I allow somebody else to love me?
Am I ready to love somebody else?
Unless you answer yes to all questions, you should forego dating a guy.
2. Boost your confidence.
When a relationship ends up to nowhere, it takes along your self-confidence. You tend to doubt if you are worth loving or capable of loving someone. Thus, make sure you can work on your level of self-confidence. Bring it several notches higher.
If you are having a hard time doing so, you can always use subliminal messages. The subliminal messages can help change your manner of thinking. Just take the following as examples:
I am capable of loving again.
I am worthy to be loved.
I am letting go of the pain.
I deserve to be loved and to love.
If you are going to repeat these subliminal messages, what is going to happen? The subliminal messages will slowly become your truths. You can already start getting rid of the negative thoughts that are bringing your self-confidence down and replace them with hope or optimism.
3. Take care of yourself.
Make yourself look good. After all, you want to capture men's attention to you. Make yourself beautiful and sexy. Exercise and go on a diet. Take care of your skin. Never go out looking so drab. You will never know who you are going to meet later.
4. Surround yourself with a lot of love.
It is when you are lonely and depressed that you definitely require the love and care of your friends and family. Along with the subliminal messages, the support you can derive from them will further enhance your self-esteem. You will feel the love again, and this is the love that will propel you to share the emotion with others.
5. Start out as friends.
You have been there before. There is no need to rush. Get to know the person very well. Determine if your personalities can blend well together. Just in case it does not work out, you do not end up with no one. You can still maintain the friendship.
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