subject: I am Hurt and Confused Over My Breakup – Help! [print this page] I am Hurt and Confused Over My Breakup Help!
Sometimes a breakup catches you completely unaware. You had no idea it was coming. Now that it has, you feel as though you've been sucker punched and just can't seem to catch your breath. It's not a good feeling to be hurt and confused in the aftermath of a breakup. Underneath it all, one fact remains. You want to get your ex back as much as you need to breathe. There's no reason that can't happen but now probably isn't the best time to take action to make that happen. You need a little time to adjust and get your bearings first.
Your breakup has left you reeling but that's no reason to let it keep you down. You're hurting now and you may even be confused as to why the breakup happened. You probably thought things were going well between the two of you so the breakup seems to have come from left field. For now you just need to start picking up the pieces of your broken heart and then you can start focusing on what your next move will be. Once you've begun to see clearly again after your breakup you can begin to consider options for getting your ex back and making your relationship work this time around.
It isn't easy to start over with relationships. Second chances are quite rare. The main reason they are so rare though has little to do with the complexities of it and more to do with the tenacity of those trying to get that important second chance. This does NOT advocate becoming a stalker but taking the time to study your options and create a plan for success BEFORE you make your first move. If you really want to get your ex back after a breakup you need to have a plan in place that covers a few possible contingencies. No matter how well you script it in your mind, life rarely follows a well-written script.
Coming up with a successful plan requires a little bit of emotional distance though so it's important to let a little time pass. Make this time the "no contact" period so that your emotions aren't running high in the face of new potential rejections, highs, or lows as a result of coming face to face with your ex. This time apart also lets your ex have the opportunity to really start missing having you around. It's pretty effective all around if you can stick with it.
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