subject: How Can I Become Better Adjusted and Able to See Things in Perspective After My Breakup? [print this page] How Can I Become Better Adjusted and Able to See Things in Perspective After My Breakup?
In relationships, like in most things, we are not easily, if at all able to change the other person, or the way things are, from their point of view. However, and very importantly, we are able to change ourselves, and the way we think, and respond to external issues, and our thoughts.
OK, that was a mouth full. Let's break it down a little bit.
Relationships can be complex, and the way that a situation may be interpreted will be based on each person's experiences of life, and their upbringing. Hence, if a situation is being discussed, each person will bring into the conversation, their past life views affecting the particular subject.
Now, if a relationship has progressed to a point where it is in trouble, it is usually as a result of a breakdown in both tolerance, as well as communication. This is not a judgment, but rather, a very general overview on a common set of circumstances that can occur.
However, it is always worth noting that everything is able to be better dealt with when we are following a more structured plan, in the way in which we perceive the world and events around us. You will no doubt notice that I am being quite specific in indicating that we have to accept responsibility for everything that happens to us. As long as we find reasons and excuses to blame others, we will always be behind the eight ball, and never in control of our lives.
I realize this may all seem quite confronting at first, but I say this, as it is the first step to getting over many of your problems. I have often referred to this method of thinking as "above the line."
It means that we are being responsible, and accept that everything that happens to us in life is the result of our actions, or more specifically sometimes, our reactions.
Once we accept this, we can better position ourselves to start dealing constructively with this, or any other problem.
I know it can be very confronting, but it is really important to consider these issues, and recognize them for what they are. We are responsible for just about everything that happens to us.
The good news with this is that we can also be responsible for implementing a positive and workable solution too!
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