subject: Why Are You Holding On To Your Weight? [print this page] Why Are You Holding On To Your Weight? Why Are You Holding On To Your Weight?
So why do you think you're overweight? What is it that you tell yourself over and over again?
Do you lack motivation?
Lack discipline?
Is it that you never finish what you've started?
That you're greedy?
That you're lazy?
These are all reasons I am given by my clients time and time again.
What do they all have in common?
They suggest it is somehow your fault' there's an element of blame
They suggest you are lacking in some way that you are weak or sinful
They're a great way of putting yourself down making yourself feel bad
They appear to be part of your identity, your personality and hence permanent
None of which is very helpful, if you're wanting to lose weight!
Why You Might Be Holding On To Your Weight
The fact is that the reasons why we are overweight are often much deeper and much more complex than that. Very often, at a subconscious level, we are holding onto our weight for very good reason (or what seemed like a very good reason at the time).
For example, I saw a client a few days ago who told me she felt that if she lost lots of weight she would be losing something. When I asked her what, she said she didn't know. Then, when we started talking about her childhood, it transpired that she was not only very small when she was young, but she was also put into classes with children much older than her. The result of this was that they used to constantly comment on her size, tease her and even throw her around between them as if she were a rag-doll!
As we talked further, more stories like this came out how because of her size she was always given girly roles which she hated, made to sit on peoples' laps which made her feel silly and so on. Then, in her late teens she started putting on lots of weight. Thus the weight was her way of making herself bigger, making herself more significant, commanding respect if she was bigger people could no longer treat her in this way.
So, for this particular client, it appears that size (weight) had become associated at a subconscious level with status and respect. She is holding onto her weight because if she loses it she fears she will lose that hard-won status and respect.
This can often be hard for clients to reconcile. At a conscious level they are more likely to believe that being overweight leads to lack of status and lack of respect. But these beliefs are at a subconscious level we are not consciously aware of them.
Other Common Reasons For Holding Onto Weight
There are lots of other reasons why you might be holding onto your weight:-
Using weight to get noticed when feeling unloved
Using weight as a shield no-one can hurt me now
Using weight as a cloak no-one can see the real me
Using weight as a barrier no-one can get to me now
Using weight as sexual protection no-one will want me now
How To Resolve The Issues
Often, just understanding where the apparent need to put on weight came from can be enough to resolve the issue and enable you to move forward with your life. Also important is the recognition that this response came about when you were much younger, far less experienced in life and with far fewer resources to draw on than you have available to you now. You don't need to use the weight for this purpose any longer.
Sometimes, however, it can be useful to enlist the professional support of an NLP Master Practitioner, a Timeline therapist or other therapist to help you work through and resolve the issues.
Summary
So, you might lack the motivation and discipline to lose weight. You might well start on a weight loss programme and not be able to finish it. You might well believe that you are greedy or lazy. However, there might also be a good reason for all of this: you are holding onto the weight for fear of losing something else. Determine what that is, whether you need it any longer and, if you do, how you can protect it in other ways. Once you've done that, your life-long battle with weight could well be over.
welcome to Insurances.net (https://www.insurances.net)
