subject: The Art of Accepting Help with Your Wedding [print this page] The Art of Accepting Help with Your Wedding
Whether you have been married before or not, or helped plan a wedding for a friend or family member, you have undoubtedly heard stories about weddings, and their planners, getting out of control. With the stress involved in planning such an important day, it doesn't always take much to send someone over the edge. Oftentimes that person is the bride. It might be something trivial like mailing the wedding invitations one day earlier or later than planned, as if that really makes a difference in the whole scheme of things. Or, it might be something big, like the church or other location selected for the ceremony not being available on the right day.
Now that you are getting ready to plan your own wedding, it's time to learn how to prevent that loss of control. When talking about loss of control, you need to be able to think about it from two perspectives. The first is the control of the planning process. This is a really big job for any one person to handle. The second is control of yourself and your behavior during the planning and time leading up to your wedding. Again, keep in mind that this is a really big job for any one person to handle.
On the first point of control, remember that your friends and family want to be involved in the planning of your wedding. This should make you happy that they care and want to help you. So, figure out a way to get them involved, without relinquishing control of what you think is most important. Would it really hurt if your best friend addressed the envelopes for the wedding invitations instead of doing it yourself? Think about the time it would free up that you could use for some other task. Then think about the joy it would give your friend to be so involved. It's really quite simple if you think about tasks that can be done by a helping hand. You are still making the decisions, but you have extra help for the "doing" part of the work.
As for the second point of control, it is essential that you not lose yours and become one of those awful "bridezillas" that jokes are made about. Actually, if you graciously accept the offers of help in preparing for your wedding, you should be calmer and more relaxed, which should help you maintain control. There is an art to accepting the help of your friends and family, and if you can do it graciously it will make your wedding planning experience as joyous as you want your wedding day to be.
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