subject: Four Divorce Tips For Men To Prevent You From Going Broke! [print this page] As you contemplate getting a divorce or if you are in the heat of a battle of one there are so many issues that have to be resolved such as: alimony, child support, child custody, marital property settlements just to name a few.
If you learn and use the techniques that I'm about to show you, you'll avoid a long-drawn out and expensive divorce. And if you learn and use these techniques you'll get peace of mind and get out of pain much faster.
If you don't learn and USE these techniques that I am about to show you it will cost you more legal fees, wasted time, frustration, lack of control of your life and even depression.
No doubt you have most likely contacted or considered contacting a divorce lawyer about your unique set of circumstances. They are trained in family law. Notice that I said LAW and not FINANCES.
A good divorce attorney will be trained for mediation, collaborative law and of course the traditional legal system for divorce. They will help you with the legal aspects to make sure you know what your legal rights are.
Keep in mind that as you go through a divorce you need to see the whole picture and not just the legal aspects of it.
You will be faced with the financial aspects and will have to make decisions about alimony, child support, division of assets, tax consequences, marital and premarital assets, debts etc.
Here are a few divorce methods that are available to everyone:
* Mediated Divorce - Although less expensive, it does not always yield a fair and equitable settlement because you are pushed through an an intense process of horse trading without knowing what the real numbers look like - unless a CDFA(TM) is there to guide you. Average cost is $7,000.
* Litigated Divorce - The average cost is $78,000 and does not include the lost opportunity costs resulting from having to spend time preparing and attending all those meetings.
Example: You are a professional making $200 per hour. Meetings and preparation over the one year it took to litigate your divorce required you to spend 50 hours in meetings and preparation. Your lost opportunity cost - an additional $10,000.
* Collaborative Divorce - This method uses a team approach. You hire an attorney to advise you of your legal rights and agrees not to litigate. A therapist is used as a "referee" and to help with communication and keep things moving. A Certified Divorce Financial Analyst(TM) is hired to create financial reports and a win/win financial solution. Other professionals may be needed such as actuaries, accountants, business valuation experts and vocational experts.
If this is the wave of the future, as the US News & World Report article suggests, your collaboration efforts will be greatly empowered by having both a good attorney and a CDFA(TM) to guide you.* Average cost is $20,000.
*Source: Collaborative Divorce Could Be Society's Wave of the Future. US News & World Report, June 1, 2008
Here are four action steps to divorce quickly and get through it with the least amount of pain and costs:
1.Get educated about the facts by going to your state's bar association website and drill down to the family law section.
2.You have to know where you are financially and what it could look like for both of you after your divorce is finalized. So hire a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst(TM) to create "what if" analysis and financial projections for various settlement offers BEFORE you hire an attorney.
3.Take immediate action right now and write down your desired outcome for your divorce. Gaining clarity about what you want and don't want will help you more than you think.
4.Exercise, eat healthy and feed your mind by reading inspirational books on a daily basis. This means that you will be getting out of your comfort zone and growing and that is a good thing.
This is a stessful time and you have to manage it. This too shall pass so be patient. Treat this like a business transaction because that is what it is...nothing less...nothing more.
by: Scott Martin
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