subject: Online dating profiles, is he yours if his is still up? [print this page] Online dating profiles, is he yours if his is still up?
The online dating profile can cause stress to a budding relationship. Meeting online, like meeting anywhere else, is only a first step in getting interested in someone. It is only natural, that if there is a connection and partners are going to be curious about one another, they want to gather as much info as possible. If you meet at work, school, or through friends or family, you have resources to get a feel for the person. Common people you know well enough might assist you in getting a feel for how you and your potential partner may mesh. If you meet online, however, your only connection is the Internet, at least initially. There is nothing wrong with searching for the same kinds of answers there. So expect to be looked into by anyone who is responsible and potentially serious about you. In fact, approach it the way you would if a friend came up to you and said "So and so was asking about you, I think they are kind of into you"
Back to our question, once you decide you want to focus only on the person you are "involved with" and not accept any other dates; you should hide your profile. When meeting someone online, there are a lot of unknowns so it is only natural that once someone is truly interested in you, they will attempt to gather some information about you. This information will be used in your terrestrial relationship as well as online. So nothing is going to make them feel more secure or inclined to trust you than noticing that you hid/removed your profile after meeting them. Trust me; this is much better than them finding out that you are still active on several sites.
I can already hear someone saying: "I don't want to appear desperate or scare them away". If asked why you took down your profile, you can simply say "I didn't delete it, I hid it for now. I date online because of my schedule (being new to the area, or whatever your reason) and didn't want to become distracted. I wanted to give you the undivided attention you deserve". Dating online can be a complicated process to those who are new to it. There are techniques though to make it a positive experience.
Good luck.
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