subject: The Secret of What Men Want in Relationships [print this page] There are many theories about what men want in a relationship. And sometimes, even men don't realize that what they THINK they want and what they REALLY want are two different things.
For example, some men think they want a trophy wife. Often this is in order to impress colleagues, clients and friends, by adhering to what they believe is a certain "image" of success. But that "image" may come with too high a price, and the relationship ends. Trophy wives are often extremely high maintenance, both financially and emotionally.
Others seem to want another mother. On the one hand, they behave like little boys who need a parent to take care of them. On the other hand, they resent being "controlled" and treated like a childeven though they often ACT like a child. These relationships often end after a long and painful downward spiral.
Half of the secret is making him feel like the most important man in your world. While you may be painfully aware of his flaws, throwing them in his face will only make them worse. Instead, emphasize his good qualities. When you say things like "I really appreciate when you _____________" it gives him the positive reinforcement to not only do that again, but look for more ways to elicit your praise.
The other half of the secret to what men really want is revealed in the paradoxical statement "I'm the boss and I have my wife's permission to say so." It acknowledges the fact that in most relationships, there is a balance of power founded on mutual respect.
By allowing him to be the "public" boss, he feels respected. More importantly, he can show the world how respected he is. In return, he will respect you and pay attention to your opinion in the important things. If he's the "public" boss, you don't contradict him in front of others or belittle his decisions. You don't subject him to ridicule be telling other people how stupid he is.
Men like to feel like they're in control, but most of all they like to feel like they're needed. And the more you make him feel like the best man in the world, the closer he will be to becoming the best man in the world.
The Secret of What Men Want in Relationships
By: Bob Grant
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