subject: First Step in Helping Your Child Deal With Drug Abuse - Dealing With Denial [print this page] One of the things I see happen all the time with parents and their teenagers is that they do not do what is necessary in order to help their own child. There are steps that you need to take in order to help your child break the addiction they live under. However, what I see happen at times is that the parents are either unable or unwilling to do what is necessary to help their own teenagers drug abuse.
I don't think it is because we are bad parents or that we don't care, I just think it is either we don't know what to do or we do not have the resolve to do what is necessary in order to help our teenagers that are abusing drugs.
But sometimes I will watch parents operate out of a state of denial. Even when their child is messing up, not coming home, not doing what they had promised to do, the parents will continue to allow them to live in a state of rebellion.
Denial has been defined as "a false system of beliefs that are not based on reality" and "a self-protecting behavior that keeps us from honestly facing the truth."
Parents will more than often come up with excuses and things that keep them from seeing the truth about what is taking place in their Childs life.
For instance, I know of parents who will continue to bail out their teenager who is using drugs every time they get into trouble. Every single time their teenager gets into trouble with drugs, they come up with excuses and bail the child out. This kid has never paid the price for his actions or drug abuse.
Those parents are in denial.
They have a self-protecting behavior that keeps them from honestly facing the truth."
This is probably the first step in helping your teenager deal with drug abuse. You have to take an honest look at yourself and ask...
Am I making excuses for my child
Am I making excuses for my own reactions
You see excuses are coping skills we have developed since childhood and they follow us into adult hood. They allow us to deny the truth and not have to deal with what is front of us. If we were to be honest making excuses and denying the truth in front of us helps us deal with our own guilt.
Parents who have teens using drugs deal with a lot of guilt and the way parents deal with this guilt is by denying the truth. Making excuses!
Let me say this right now. Deal with the guilt you may have, but do not allow your own feelings hinder the recovery of your own child. Stop denying and making excuses for your child and begin working with the reality that is front of you.
Phill Longmire has been helping parents over the last 11 years deal with their teenagers drug use. His website at http://www.teenagedrugabuseonline.com/ offers advice to parents who are dealing with teens who are using drugs. Phill's report "Help...My Teen is Using Drugs" is jam packed with tips and techniques that will allow you to help your teen today begin the hard long road of recovery.
First Step in Helping Your Child Deal With Drug Abuse - Dealing With Denial
By: phillip longmire
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