subject: How To Talk To Women When You Are Shy - 3 Dating Tips For Shy Guys [print this page] As a former "shy guy," I can totally relate to what it feels like to try and picture yourself being comfortable talking to women. As much as you'd like to be able to see it as being easy, past experience tells you that it probably will not be that way. There's no use in me giving one of those "go get 'em" pep talks, because those kinds of things don't usually give a lasting effect. What I will try to do is show a few things that helped me get comfortable with talking to women, to the point where today, most people would not believe that it was ever a problem.
One of the things that will ultimately help you talk to women if you are a shy guy, is to learn how to use your momentum once you do have some success and some of it starts to "click" for you. Starting out, you don't want to waste any possible positive energy that you have, because that momentum can take you much further if you let it. For example, if you have a day where it just seems easy to talk to women for whatever reason, then go ahead and try and talk to as many women as you can to keep that momentum going.
Here's 3 tips on how to talk to women that really helped me:
1) STOP imagining that you are going to mess things up.
Chances are, if you are a shy guy, then you do a lot of thinking, sometimes too much about what could happen. Worrying about what could happen or what might happen just really makes things worse than they have to be. When I stopped imagining that I would mess things up, it instantly had a positive effect on me. I won't say that it worked like magic, because it didn't However, getting out of my own head did allow me to feel a little more comfortable when talking to a woman.
2) Let HER do as much talking as she wants to.
The funniest thing about being a good conversationalist... is that a lot of it depends on your ability to listen to a woman. One of the things that held me back when I was a "shy guy," was always feeling like I really did not have much to say. See, if you let her do as much of the talking as she wants to, and you bounce your conversation off of that... you won't end up with nothing to say to her. Whether it is responding to what she is saying, or taking something that she has said and then running with it, you will find that you suddenly have a lot to say.
3) Find YOUR rhythm and stick to it.
Controlling the tempo of the conversation is a good way to feel comfortable in that situation, so this is something that you need to work on. Don't feel rushed and don't feel like you have to be "ON" the whole time that you are talking to her. Find your rhythm and run with it.
by: Chris Tyler
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