subject: What to Tell Children When Getting a Divorce [print this page] What to Tell Children When Getting a Divorce
Parents often think that what they are doing is absolutely right when they tell their children everything, especially divorce details. This act is the most common mistake parents commit. When a parent is not yet ready for divorce or when the divorce period is still undetermined, telling the children before divorce actually happens is wrong. Children become more anxious and start to feel different negative emotions which can make them less stable. When children know that parents are getting divorced, they try to patch things up because they think they are the reason. It is therefore recommended to tell the children about splitting up when both parties are prepared to transfer into different households.
When you tell a child that his or her parents are splitting up, they will get confused seeing their parents living in the same house. Normally, younger children cannot understand the idea of divorce and older children understand divorce better. Sometimes, children think that they caused all of it.
Some parents say that telling the truth to their children actually helps so that their children will know how badly their parents actually are, that's why they're getting divorced. This is a major mistake since children should be left out of the issue. It's unfair for them to hear negative comments about their parents, especially when it comes from their own mom and dad. The last thing children need is choosing which parent they'll take side on. If parents are really concerned about their children's welfare, the least they'll do is sabotage the reputation of the other parent.
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