subject: Child Behavior Problem - How To Manage Child Anger Effectively And Make Progress [print this page] Child Behavior Problem - How To Manage Child Anger Effectively And Make Progress
Learning how to manage child anger is one of the most difficult challenges you can face when dealing with this classic child behavior problem.
One of the best tactics is of course talking to your child and finding out what exactly is causing his or her anger. Obviously we cannot do that at the time when the angry outburst happens but we can choose a quieter calmer moment later on and then approach the subject.
We are doing something very important here. If there has been a violent physical reaction such as kicking the furniture or punching a sibling, we are trying to get the child to verbalize his feelings and emotions rather than lashing out. That is essential as we begin to probe and ask him how he felt, why he reacted in that way and so on.
Then we can move on to discussing what the alternatives might be or what he could do to calm down. Or we can talk about the consequences of his actions and how he might avoid all that trouble the next time round.
I know that some parents have no patience in imposing consequences to correct violent behavior and they themselves may be tempted to give them a spanking. That may sound old fashioned but it is still used a lot. But violence begets violence and the results of all the studies on child behavior shows that aggressive behavior only increases, if children themselves have been physically beaten or punished. This is especially true of children with psychological problems.
As regards children being exposed to violence in the media, it is a good idea to control it where possible because all the violent video games and war games are having an effect on the child.
As we can see imposing limits is all important when we are faced with a child behavior problem. Everyone in the family has to know the limits and these should be clearly displayed on the fridge door or in another suitable central location. The limits and the bottom line are there for everyone to see. Slamming doors, hitting siblings, throwing things around are just not tolerated and neither is swearing.
These are just a few ways we can approach the most common child behavior problem of anger. But we really need to go deeper and learn lots of strategies to cope with aggression, violence and swearing and other angry behavior so that we are not overwhelmed. The best way to do this is to seek out a decent behavior therapy program or simple effective parenting skills. Why not try this one? You will never look back
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