subject: Does a Shy child become a socially anxious adult [print this page] Does a Shy child become a socially anxious adult
Many parents show concern over their children's shyness. A shy child , who is not overly shy, maybe cute; but there's always the fear that he will develop into an adult that suffers from excessive shyness and social anxiety. So let us examine whether shy children invariably develop into socially anxious adult or not? First of all, if we understand the root of a child's shyness we can assess whether it will be long standing or not. A child that is shy, or socially inhibited, because he has a speech problem (stuttering for example) might not necessarily develop into a shy adult. In case with identifiable causes, you remove the cause and you improve the chances of recovery from shyness. But please note that the problems that persist the longest are the most notorious to treat. And sometimes, even after the long-standing underlying problem has been addressed, shyness seems to persist. This is because with the passage of time, it becomes increasingly difficult for a child to get rid of his shyness; old habits die hard as they say. If the root of the child's shyness is something beyond your control: fear not, there is still hope. Sometimes by developing a special skill your child possesses you can help them tremendously by reinforcing their self-esteem. Some shy children even benefit from repeated exposures to situations which they deem difficult, like special drama classes or summer camps.
Having said that, it is important to note that sometimes there is no identifiable cause for the child's social anxiety. In these instances, try to assess the situation objectively. Is the child's shyness very pronounced? Is it affecting his/her social life? Is it causing them any distress? Because making the distinction between a child who is only shy around adult strangers and a child whose social anxiety causes them to have no friends is very important. If your child's shyness is distressing him/her, or if it is socially incapacitating, in addition to offering unconditional love and support, please consider consulting a professional. Early therapy usually has the best benefits and can detect any unresolved issues or conflicts that the child might have. So, the answer to the extreme shyness and social anxiety dilemma in childhood is, in many instances, parental awareness and positive interference. Otherwise, these children may indeed suffer for many years to come.
It is important to say, however, that some children do outgrow their shyness and social anxiety, but these children tend to be the least affected in the first place. And since, as a parent, you have no way of knowing, it is always better to play it safe and err on the side of caution because consulting a professional child psychologist or behavioral therapist offers the best results when started early.
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