subject: The Best Way To Encourage Kids [print this page] One of our biggest battles as parents has been the way to motivate young people - A couple of of our teenagers in particular. One of them is just plain lazy, the other one is a struggling teen - issues in school, usually depressed, and at times particularly obnoxious.
You definitely need to have a method to encourage kids, and here are a couple of ideas that we've found over the years that we've determined function quite well. One of the things we've discovered is that it's impossible for teenagers not to be inspired - it simply will depend on what they're motivated to accomplish. Very often, they're motivated to stand against us, distance themselves, or under-perform. Instead of acting out, they're acting in!
Therefore just how can you encourage teens? Right here are 3 tips to get you started:
1. Look at just what your teenager enjoys. The strategy here is to notice just what your kid likes to do. Do not take his word for it; he'll state nothing at all matters". Nevertheless look at his actions - does he watch a lot of Tv, enjoy video games, play on the pc? Observe, and write them down - later on you can make use of these kinds of items as bonuses.
2. Take the goodies out of his room. Underachieving teenagers shouldn't have very much in their bedroom - it will probably merely be a place for them to withdraw. Computer, Television, video games, and if he's not performing, even his mobile telephone.
3. Quit doing your child's tasks for him. This is called "learned helplessness" and it's not very good at all. It doesn't guide them to learn self-sufficiency. Don't complete their homework for them; if you desire, you can be readily available for help, but don't do it. One thing I've recognized about my kids is if I make them do it on their own, they'll rise to the occasion and be quite delighted with themselves.
One thing you have to comprehend is that staying an underachiever offers your teenager a feeling of control and power, because she doesn't have to worry about the anxiety of failing or meeting responsibilities. She doesn't have to deal with people's expectations. As soon as people start expecting more of these kinds of young people, they come apart.
by: Matt Hellstrom
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