subject: Putting my Child up For Adoption [print this page] Putting my Child up For Adoption Putting my Child up For Adoption
If you are considering putting your child up for adoption it could possibly be one of the most challenging things a parent can go through. This is a decision you will suffer over for years to come after arriving at this decision. You feel like your life is spinning out of control and you don't know how to stop the confusion.
It is hard to remain in focus when your entire existence seems to be collapsing all around you. It is urgent that you soothe your emotions and attempt to arrive at some rational decisions. Write down a list as to the advantages and disadvantages of keeping your baby or going the route of adoption. Always keep in mind what will benefit your child now and in the future. I can ensure you one thing with utmost certainty. Should your decision be one of adoption the heartbreak is unavoidable. There is no doubt this is going to be stressful on you and those giving you support. But everyone wants their child brought up in a secure, caring situation, and at this juncture in your life you may not be able to do this.
Thirty-nine years ago as a pregnant teen I was confronted with this decision. I had a small number of choices available to me. Now, anyone wishing to give their child up for adoption has available to them a variety of family services that will direct them through the whole adoption process.
An open adoption will permit you to choose the adopting parents and reach an agreement involving further contact after the child is born. Again, any capable family service will inform of your options.
Each state has their own specific laws as to adoption and it's a good idea to become acquainted with them prior to doing anything at all. A good point of reference that will provide you the laws in each state is http://topics.law.cornell.edu/wex/table_adoption.
In all honesty I don't believe it is possible to break the bond between a mother and her child. It took me thirty-eight years to be reunited with my son, and all that time I continued to speculate about him and prayed that everything was good for him. When your baby is wholly dependent on you for 9 months they become your top priority in your life.
Eventually it appears that everything you live for is for the baby. You wish it be healthy and while you are carrying the baby and caring for the baby you of course become attached at an emotional level. When you eventually have to give your baby to the adoptive parents you will feel heart breaking loss. There is no getting around it. You will never forget them, forever keep them near to your heart, hope entirely for their success in life and love, and naturally love them.
Ultimately you will heal, the raw emotions will turn to positive thoughts that your decision gave your baby the best chance to have everything in life you wished for them. Since my adopted out son is now back in my life, I see that my choice of putting my child up for adoption proved to be one of the wisest decisions I have ever made in my life.
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